I'm a B girl

[Algerian's light]

I walk alone in a narrow path
totally lonely oh it's too hard
the fate treat me so bad
and my soul is enjailed
by the darkness of the world
oh . my heart cry out loud
and my eyes wipe blood
.......................................
there is no differtent
to live or to die
staying or going it's the same
I'm waiting just to over the game
without feelings oh what's a shame
this is my way to reach the aim
hey you there the handsome
if you want to know how I am
miss bad girl it's my name

this is my first try. so please Karim_Rap_4_life correct my errors...........

[حكاية قلب]

Wow

*
*
Nice writing Girl i Love it so much
really there are some mistakes like u said

and u wish if Karim Correct it
hhhhh

Ok
i'll let him do
C'mmon Karim Correct them


By the way plz can u tell me what u mean By
enjailed

you have a good pen i wish u Good Luck

Carry On


^.^

Peace

[Karim_Rap_4_life]

Yes I will do ...Just hold on okey I think I would like it

[مهاجرة إلى ربي]

المشاركة الأصلية كتبت بواسطة Algerian's light

I walk alone in a narrow path
totally lonely oh it's too hard
the fate treat me so bad
and my soul is enjailed
by the darkness of the world
oh . my heart cry out loud
and my eyes wipe blood
.......................................
there is no differtent
to live or to die
staying or going it's the same
I'm waiting just to over the game
without feelings oh what's a shame
this is my way to reach the aim
hey you there the handsome
if you want to know how I am
miss bad girl it's my name

this is my first try. so please Karim_Rap_4_life correct my errors...........

allah almosta3an,

what is this my sister?
i have badly tried to match what is in your signature with these words ?

or it's just a style ?

i khnow that you khnow what doses it mean : a bad girl

so ma dear sister ... be aware and don't forget that

(( مَا يَلْفِظُ مِنْ قَوْلٍ إِلَّا لَدَيْهِ رَقِيبٌ عَتِيدٌ)) ‏

your sister

[Karim_Rap_4_life]

First of all thank you for calling me to correct

and post my views I'm really admired by your

request yeah whatever we are friends without

asking me I do that I just did not notice your

topic okey let's see:

remember that every member right here make a lot of

mistakes so don't be upset for this long list but

I guarantee you will learn so much from them

Mistakes:

walk___I'm Walking

I think you should say I'm walking why? because

it is your life so:

your life is just like in here

سلم زمني

A___________B___________C

A is the past

B is the present

C is the future

you're walking in a narrow path:

When you start walking? of course before "b"

when will you stop? ofcourse "c"

when you do something but you still don't finish it

you should use ("to be" in present+Verb+ing)

it is called the present Continious In french

"le present Progressive".

It will be better if you say

"I'm walking through a narrow path"

treat____Treats

you are talking about the way you live so you need

to use the present tense because you are describing

a present situation....If so the (Fate is a single )

always add "s" to the verbe in case of (she, he, It)

enjailed__Jailed_Imprisoned

Darkness of the world____Darkness world

loud____aloud_loudly_so loud

Adverbe comes after verb why "because it describe

the way the doer does and action"

Adjective come after Nouns

my eyes wipe blood___shed tears of bloods

Over the game___make the game Over

but I know you need to put "game" in the

end because of the rhymes so you can just say

"I'm waiting just To finish the Game"

.....how I am______Who am I?

Your poem:

The ideas of the poem are a words of a strong Girl

"I walk alone in a narrow path"

"totally lonely oh it's too hard"

you are sinking in loneliness you mentioned the

word lonely and alone they are serving the same

meaning I guess you're lonely for real the narrow path

it is just like you have no other way to achieve your

goals.

"the fate treat me so bad"__Yeah that's of bad

situation but you know what fate is the choise of

our GOD and we obey God's willing just be patient

God choose for as things to happen whatever they are

good or bad even if they are worse there is a wisedom

in them just because of God is examining us if we

are a real belivers so just hold on

my own opinion but don't take it seriously I think

you should not say "fate treat me so bad" I don't know

If I was you I wouldn't write it ...never be disapointed

we all make mistakes remember that.

- your soul is jailed by the darkness It is really

well chosen words I like it so much

-"There is no different if you go or stay"..no one will

miss you and care for you if you Go or stay???

I think you mean that don't you??

"Bad Girl" the name that you mention

and the way you called that handsome it just like

hey you know what "I'm really who I am" you said

it in a way of self confident and that's the bad girls do

there is to things of expressions...But I think "bad Girl is not appropreatefull
I think you are cute Girl..."

-self expression______You know how to express your feeling very well

-Ideas expression____You know how to write them down ...Gramatical

structure and rhymes and vocabulary and so on

In poetry I think you should know firstly "Self expression" secondly "ideas expressions"

why?

If you know how to apply rhymes and grammar and all things but have nothing to say about your self that's terrible and you can do nothing becasue self comprehension is something obligatory

about a the gramar and mistakes it's simple and you can just learn more and more progressively

by the time but with so works and exercises...

I think you know how to express your self but there is just a little problem with Grammar but not a big deal believe me just continue and you need to follow other members writing and especially when someones correct their mistakes you will learn so much.

My last words right here just write and "shin shyn" and me are the ones who are supposed to encourage you and guide you why no you are an "algerian Light" don't you?

[برعم امل]

can i ask you ?? why you said*there is no différent
to live or to die** you must live and like your life and your gad if you really want reach to your aim
really i think you feel by sad and niss ????????????? i think

[Algerian's light]

المشاركة الأصلية كتبت بواسطة shin hyun

Wow

*
*
Nice writing Girl i Love it so much
really there are some mistakes like u said

and u wish if Karim Correct it
hhhhh

Ok
i'll let him do
C'mmon Karim Correct them


By the way plz can u tell me what u mean By
enjailed

you have a good pen i wish u Good Luck

Carry On


^.^

Peace

]
thaaaanks a looooooooot sister...
*enjailed mean مسجون in arabic. I don't know if it is true

[Algerian's light]

المشاركة الأصلية كتبت بواسطة Karim_Rap_4_life

First of all thank you for calling me to correct

and post my views I'm really admired by your

request yeah whatever we are friends without

asking me I do that I just did not notice your

topic okey let's see:

remember that every member right here make a lot of

mistakes so don't be upset for this long list but

I guarantee you will learn so much from them

Mistakes:

walk___I'm Walking

I think you should say I'm walking why? because

it is your life so:

your life is just like in here

سلم زمني

A___________B___________C

A is the past

B is the present

C is the future

you're walking in a narrow path:

When you start walking? of course before "b"

when will you stop? ofcourse "c"

when you do something but you still don't finish it

you should use ("to be" in present+Verb+ing)

it is called the present Continious In french

"le present Progressive".

It will be better if you say

"I'm walking through a narrow path"

treat____Treats

you are talking about the way you live so you need

to use the present tense because you are describing

a present situation....If so the (Fate is a single )

always add "s" to the verbe in case of (she, he, It)

enjailed__Jailed_Imprisoned

Darkness of the world____Darkness world

loud____aloud_loudly_so loud

Adverbe comes after verb why "because it describe

the way the doer does and action"

Adjective come after Nouns

my eyes wipe blood___shed tears of bloods

Over the game___make the game Over

but I know you need to put "game" in the

end because of the rhymes so you can just say

"I'm waiting just To finish the Game"

.....how I am______Who am I?

Your poem:

The ideas of the poem are a words of a strong Girl

"I walk alone in a narrow path"

"totally lonely oh it's too hard"

you are sinking in loneliness you mentioned the

word lonely and alone they are serving the same

meaning I guess you're lonely for real the narrow path

it is just like you have no other way to achieve your

goals.

"the fate treat me so bad"__Yeah that's of bad

situation but you know what fate is the choise of

our GOD and we obey God's willing just be patient

God choose for as things to happen whatever they are

good or bad even if they are worse there is a wisedom

in them just because of God is examining us if we

are a real belivers so just hold on

my own opinion but don't take it seriously I think

you should not say "fate treat me so bad" I don't know

If I was you I wouldn't write it ...never be disapointed

we all make mistakes remember that.

- your soul is jailed by the darkness It is really

well chosen words I like it so much

-"There is no different if you go or stay"..no one will

miss you and care for you if you Go or stay???

I think you mean that don't you??

"Bad Girl" the name that you mention

and the way you called that handsome it just like

hey you know what "I'm really who I am" you said

it in a way of self confident and that's the bad girls do

there is to things of expressions...But I think "bad Girl is not appropreatefull
I think you are cute Girl..."

-self expression______You know how to express your feeling very well

-Ideas expression____You know how to write them down ...Gramatical

structure and rhymes and vocabulary and so on

In poetry I think you should know firstly "Self expression" secondly "ideas expressions"

why?

If you know how to apply rhymes and grammar and all things but have nothing to say about your self that's terrible and you can do nothing becasue self comprehension is something obligatory

about a the gramar and mistakes it's simple and you can just learn more and more progressively

by the time but with so works and exercises...

I think you know how to express your self but there is just a little problem with Grammar but not a big deal believe me just continue and you need to follow other members writing and especially when someones correct their mistakes you will learn so much.

My last words right here just write and "shin shyn" and me are the ones who are supposed to encourage you and guide you why no you are an "algerian Light" don't you?

a really thanks bro...woow woow..
I do a "Massacr" in english..But I'm so happy because I laern a lot of things so thaaaaaaaaaank youu teacher

[Karim_Rap_4_life]

hey you did nothing very bad no it is just a few mistakes so I did correct them ....I'm not a teacher i'm just like you and others hh

[حكاية قلب]

thaaaanks a looooooooot sister...
*enjailed mean مسجون in arabic. I don't know if it is true

ahhhhhh u mean 'jailed' cause ther's no word like u said
i mean enjailed

§
§


Karim

hey you did nothing very bad no it is just a few mistakes so I did correct them ....I'm not a teacher i'm just like you and others hh

Comm'Onnnnn Dnt be Shy....hhhh
Ur a Good teacher and u know it
p:

[برعم امل]

Can you be friends to me ?? really i want that......so

[Algerian's light]

المشاركة الأصلية كتبت بواسطة برعم امل

can i ask you ?? why you said*there is no différent
to live or to die** you must live and like your life and your gad if you really want reach to your aim
really i think you feel by sad and niss ????????????? i think

yeah..you're right..I must forget the and prepare for the next....thank u sis

[Algerian's light]

المشاركة الأصلية كتبت بواسطة برعم امل

Can you be friends to me ?? really i want that......so

wow that's an honor for me.look this my name in f.a.c.e.b.o.o.k. NoUr El Imane.

[برعم امل]

thank you ...............nice to meet you .................me too my name is
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