Jokes For You

[younes39]

Q. What do you get when you put a fish and an elephant together?

A. Swimming trunks.


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Q. What goes up when the rain comes down?

A. An umbrella.


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Q. What disappears when you stand up?

A. Your lap.


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Q. What did the big firecracker say to the little firecracker?

A. My pop is bigger than yours.


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Q. What did the big chimney say to the small chimney?

A. You are too little to smoke.


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Q. What do you call a surgeon with eight arms?

A. A doctopus!


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Q. Why did the teacher jump into the lake?

A. Because she wanted to test the waters!


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Q. Why did the belt go to jail?

A. Because it held up a pair of pants!


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Q. What is the center of gravity?

A. The letter V!


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Q. What did the stamp say to the envelope?

A. Stick with me and we will go places!


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Q. What sort of star is dangerous?

A. A shooting star!


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Q. Why did the teacher write the lesson on the windows?

A. He wanted the lesson to be very clear!


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Q. What kind of lights did Noah use on the Ark?

A. Flood lights!


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Q. What do computers do when they get hungry?

A. They eat chips!


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Q. Why don't you see giraffes in elementary school?

A. Because they're all in High School!


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Q. Which is the longest word in the dictionary?

A. "Smiles", because there is a mile between each "s"!


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Q. Which month do soldiers hate most?

A. The month of March!


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Q. What did the painter say to the wall?

A. One more crack like that and I'll plaster you!


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Q. Why do golfers wear two pairs of pants?

A. In case they get a hole in one!


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Q. What did the the tie say to the hat?

A. You go on a head, I'll just hang around